KATHMANDU, NEPAL – “I have lost the respect and trust of my family and the community using the drugs,” says a 20-year-old woman with a dark complexion. “But I don’t want other young girls like me to endure what I did.”

The former drug user, whose name is withheld to protect her from the social stigma attached to drug use, is from Lalitpur, a neighboring district of Kathmandu. Influenced by friends, she says she switched from smoking cigarettes to smoking marijuana at the age of 15.

She eventually became addicted. A puff of smoke soon became more important to her than her studies, she says. She then moved on to harder drugs.

At first, it scared her when she and her male friends went to the nearby woods to smoke “brown sugar,” a slang term for an adulterated form of street heroin, rolled in a cigarette. But when she tried it, it felt like the Earth was moving, she says.

During those days, she felt nauseated and dizzy, with frequent headaches. But later, she started regularly using hashish, brown sugar and heroin.

“I gradually stopped going to the class,” she says.

Though she had become an addict, she didn’t want her three younger sisters to follow in her footsteps. So she used to hide her marijuana and heroin under her pillow, inside a cupboard or in old shoes.

Soon, the 5,000 rupees ($60) her parents gave her as allowance each month was no longer enough to support her drug habit. So she began selling syringes for injecting drugs.

But as her addiction grew, she resorted to sex work as a way to make fast cash. She says she sold her body for 2,000 rupees ($25) to buy brown sugar. And when she was high on drugs, she engaged in sexual intercourse without condoms.

Men who found out about her addiction would lure her into bed by promising money or brown sugar, she says. But they would often leave her with nothing.

Two years ago, multiple families approached her father with marriage proposals. But when the boys’ families found out about her addiction problem, they backed out. This pushed her to take more drugs, she says.

“I started believing that the drug was my friend in my good times and bad ones,” she says.

Abandoned and ostracized, she decided to give up drugs with the hope that she could return to a respectable life. She began visiting the Aavash Samuha Drop-in Center for female drug users near her home in Lalitpur.

It has been four months since she gave up drugs.

She now works as a counselor at the center, a nongovernmental agency that has been working for the rehabilitation of female drug users for more than five years. She counsels women on the risks of using drugs and transmitting HIV through syringes. She assists in the rehabilitation of former drug users and with awareness campaigns.

“At present, I openly work against drug abuse,” she says.

Now, she wants to make up for lost time with her parents.

“I made my parents very unhappy so far by getting into drugs,” she says. “I want to spend the rest of my life serving them.”

Peer pressure and failed relationships are just a few of the reasons that girls begin using drugs in Nepal. Rehabilitation for girls and women is especially challengning because of a stronger stigma attached to female drug users and the means they use to support their habits, such as sex work. Nongovernmental organizations and drop-in centers are employing former addicts to rehabilitate current users and inspire them to remain drug-free. Still, the cost of rehabilitation and medical problems from drug use remain daily barriers for them.

In 2007, there were 46,309 drug users in Nepal, 3,356 of which were female, according to a survey by the Central Bureau of Statistics of the government of Nepal. The capital, Kathmandu, alone has 17,458 drug users, according to the same survey.

The majority of female drug users are young women ages 18 to 35 from upper and upper-middle socio-economic classes, says Navaraj Silwal, senior superintendent of the Narcotic Drug Control Law Enforcement Unit of the Nepal Police.

A 17-year-old from Rautahat, a district southeast of Kathmandu, whose name has been withheld to protect her identity, is also a former drug user. She stands in a dark room at the Aavash Samuha Drop-in Center, surrounded by a dozen current female drug users.

“Friends, we all have our own problems,” she says, addressing the women in a serious tone. “But that doesn’t mean we shall ever forget those who are still taking drugs. We have to look for the alternative to tackle the problem.”

She says that her boyfriend cheated on her while she was in her early teens, and she resorted to drugs to cope. She says she started with cigarettes, then gradually switched to marijuana, heroin and then to alcohol.

When she started returning home late, her brother and sister-in-law realized she was abusing drugs. They tried to intervene, taking her phone and demanding to know her whereabouts.

She says she soon lost her family’s love and care. She fell in and out of relationships with five different men in search of true love but never found it.

“All these men left me after we had physical relations,” she says.

About a year ago, a friend took her to the Aavash Samuha Drop-in Center, where she was inspired to see female drug users such as herself not only overcoming their addiction, but also helping others in need.

Once she began taking part in music and sports activities at the center, she realized she had been on the wrong path.

“I couldn’t reach my goal to become an air hostess flying in the sky because of drug addiction,” she says.

The girl who used to loiter around getting high on hemp, brown sugar and heroin five months earlier is now working as a peer educator at the center.

Her work involves counseling female drug users on the dangers of drug abuse and exchanging syringes. She also visits “hunting areas,” or isolated areas where users exchange drugs, to refer female drug users to the center.

Silwal attributes the increasing use of drugs in Nepal to the rising prevalence of divorce, sexual permissiveness and wild party culture. He also says that parents may talk to their kids about drugs but don’t supervise them closely enough.

Peer pressure in schools, family problems and unsuccessful relationships are among the reasons that females resort to drugs, says Parina Subba Limbu, 32, program director at Dristi Nepal, an organization that provides care, treatment and rehabilitation to help reintegrate female drug users into Nepali society.

One of the main reasons for females to get into drugs is unsuccessful love, says Basanta Kunwar, chairman of Narconon Nepal, part of an international nongovernmental agency that also offers drug education and rehabilitation.

Rehabilitation includes special challenges for women, advocates and former users say.

Kunwar estimates that one female is admitted for every 100 males into rehabilitation centers in Nepal. The female drug users and their families are both reluctant to seek help from rehabilitation centers because they fear stigma, making it difficult to rehabilitate them.

If a man gets into drug abuse, his problem is only the addiction, Limbu says from experience as a former drug user. But for a female who gets into drugs, it is more difficult for her to regain her previous life.

Dr. Bishwa Bandhu Sharma, a well-known private psychiatrist and mental health specialist in Nepal who has worked with drug users for many years, explains that male users get into stealing and robbery in order to buy drugs. But females go into commercial sex work, which creates a greater stigma and makes it more difficult for them than for men to return to their pre-drug lives.

“As females have to face social stigma, they are more likely to relapse,” he says.

So various organizations are working to rehabilitate the girls and women, many times enlisting former drug addicts to drive their efforts while progressing in their own rehabilitation.

Dristi Nepal, run by reformed female drug users, has rehabilitated 150 female drug users between the ages of 14 and 40 since it opened in 2006, Limbu says.

“They are focused on taking their lives to new direction,” Limbu says of the young women in her care.  

The centers hire rehabilitated drug users to support them on this path.

Sonam Lama, chairwoman of the Aavash Samuha Drop-in Center and a former drug addict, explains that most female drug users leave school, which makes it less likely that they’ll be able to find a job or remain engaged in work. This increases their chances of relapsing, so the center employs former female drug users to work against drug abuse.

One of these former users is the 20-year-old from Lalitpur, who is now employed by the center. She says she regrets that she didn’t finish her studies after getting involved in drugs. She couldn’t secure a stable job because of her lack of educational qualifications.

“Had I studied, I would have been working as the team leader for this female drug user project,” she says of the project she is currently helping with at the center.

Other former drug users are starting programs themselves.

Limbu established Dristi Nepal with the help of her friends. She has been working to rehabilitate others for seven years.

“There was no one to help me when I needed help,” she says. “I experienced that need and, therefore, I decided to help others.”

Influenced by her peers, she began taking drugs in her early teens. Although she came from a wealthy family, drugs took her from riches to rags. Her addiction eventually drove her to think about ending her life, she says.

She overcame her addiction in 2004 and has since devoted her time to rescuing other females from drug abuse.

But she says that financial obstacles hamper her work. The organization receives financial support from a few foreign donor agencies but nothing from the government of Nepal.

“It is sheer gender discrimination because the government has allocated the budget for only the rehabilitation of the male drug users,” Limbu says.

But Yuba Raj Shrestha, officer at the Department of Narcotics Control and Disaster Management under the Home Affairs Ministry, says the government does not allocate separate budgets for female and male users, which would prove a difficult task for an underdeveloped country like Nepal.

“The primary focus of the government is to develop physical infrastructure and eliminate poverty,” Shrestha says. “Therefore, it is not possible for the government to allocate separate budget for the female drug users.”

Still, the government spends just 0.0042 percent of the budget to control the use of narcotic drugs, he says.

Adding to the cost of care and rehabilitation are medical issues that reformed users suffer.

Though the 20-year-old reformed drug addict has now dedicated her life to helping others at the Aavash Samuha Drop-in Center, the negative impact of her drug use still haunts her. Since her boyfriend is a former drug user as well as HIV-positive, she fears that she will be infected with the virus. Diagnosed with a sexually transmitted disease three months ago, she has not yet undergone any testing for HIV.

“I might have been infected with HIV,” she says. “Whatever happens, I have to bear it.”

It has been five months since the 17-year-old now working at the center overcame her addiction, but she still has various health problems as well.

“[My] chest and back hurt,” she says. “Regular common cold and respiratory problems still trouble me.”

Both current and former users face reproductive health problems, Sharma says. He explains that women’s bodies, being more delicate than those of men, become weaker sooner with the use of drugs. They face headaches, backaches, sore throats and anemia, and they are more susceptible to catching colds.

But despite her health problems, the 17-year-old is looking forward.

After drug use robbed the young woman of her family’s trust and societal acceptance, she is now working to regain both. She says that her work at the center has reawakened her dreams, and she wants to inspire others to find theirs.

“Although late, I got my insight,” she says. “I hope other girls would not get caught in this bad habit.”